another update on the great monkey invasion...

sorry I've been so absent... this kid doesn't let me do anything that doesn't serve her in some way hehehe

we've gotten into a groove and things have gotten much easier... on me at least
we play, do crafts, watch movies - run around outside as much as possible - Sam and I have both had Lyme Disease once each already this summer and I've pulled two ticks off of her since she got here so I'm a little afraid to let her play in our yard much which kinda sucks

we had gotten one of those inflatable pools to play in BUT of course since my mother hasn't gotten the water situation fixed yet we only got about 5 inches of water in it before we started having issues and had to stop filling it in favor of bathing and flushing the toilet

the pee pee issue has ceased... I think she was just adjusting to being away from home and parents for the first time - for the daytime accidents we told her if she didn't stop we'd get her diapers... after a few 'warnings' she decided she isn't a baby and didn't want to wear diapers like one!!
as for the bed wetting... it turned out she was too scared to go by herself - once I told her she can come wake up one of us to take her, that is what she does... so no more problems there - YAY!!

althoughhhhhhhhh there have been incidents where I was asleep and Sam was wide awake sitting on the couch and she wakes me instead of asking him ~sigh... whatever - at least she's not peeing in her pants

out of everyone involved I think Sam is having the hardest time adjusting - he doesn't deal well with stress to begin with... not being able to relax and get some peace & quiet when he gets home at the end of the day is REALLY wearing on him... which is in turn wearing on me

if there was any doubt before it is gone now... no kids for us!!
I can really understand now why so many people with children wind up divorced... it's hard enough to maintain a healthy marriage WITHOUT the constant distractions and interruptions - I don't think Sam and I have had one decent conversation since she got here

I don't even think to ask him how his day was anymore - either because my brain is total mush by then or there is a monkey jumping around distracting one or both of us

I also don't appreciate feeling like we have to have sex just because someone has generously given us a little time to ourselves - maybe I would like that time to enjoy the fact that I'm finally NOT being clung to

but Sam is putting up with enough already... I can't exactly deny him THAT too haaa

I don't know if I mentioned this but what happened was my sister called here FREAKING out saying she needed a break (she does this all alone 24/7/365) and asked if we could take her for a couple weeks

I said I'd check with Sam... he was cool with it so I said yes
the next thing I know she's talking about a month - so Sam and I agreed to 2-4 weeks

my mother was paying for the plane tickets... since my sister was having such a meltdown my mother (without consulting me) told her to get a one way ticket and we'll play it by ear!!

uh hello... not YOUR home that is being invaded... not YOUR life that is being flipped upside down - so who are YOU to just leave it open like that???

but it was too late... the ticket was bought before I had any chance to say anything

so anyway... the kid shows up here expecting to spend the summer - today is the one month mark and I've just started to be DONE - the last few days have been the nail in the coffin... I mean I LOVE her to bits and enjoy having her around - but it's enough already

Sam told me a week ago to tell whoever is arranging her return to get on it - he wants her on a plane back to AZ by the end of the month (that will be a 6 weeks visit by then) which I think anyone would agree is MORE than enough!!!

part of the problem is that I was under the impression that since her father is in NY she'd be spending at least one day a week with him... but my sister keeps cutting off his visits or waiting till the last possible moment to let us know if he'll be allowed to see her (she doesn't think he deserves to see her if he doesn't pay his child support) whatever - I mean I understand that is all she has to try to make him pay... but the kid is a human being not a bargaining chip

so we can't plan our lives if we never know what the weekend will hold

long story short-ish - they've all been told they need to arrange a departure date that starts with the number 7 or Sam says the rules will be HIS!! - we'll see what happens there haaaa

of course I feel bad because the kid thinks she's spending the summer and I don't wanther to think she's going home 'early' because of anything SHE did... it's just time, ya know?

I spoke to my sister and told her that we'd be glad to take her again... for no more than 2-4 weeks and with MUCH better planning before hand - so we'll see

update...

things are going pretty well... considering

a couple days after the monkey arrived I discovered I once again have the dreaded LYME DISEASE!! and possibly some sort of abscessed tooth or something... I had what felt like a popcorn kernel stuck in my gum then one morning it hurt really bad and was pretty puffy so I tried AGAIN to get out whatever was stuck in there - and it worked... I thought all was well

then I woke up the next day with the same jaw pain... and as I poked around trying to find the problem I somehow caused the whole left half of my bottom lip to go NUMB!!

which of course FREAKED ME OUT!!

it was a Monday morning and I did NOT like the prospect of having to look after this child ALL day by myself while I was freaking out over what might be causing numbness like that... sooooooo I managed to get Sam to stay home and take me to the doctor - I needed to get some antibiotics for the Lyme disease anyway - I WAS hoping to just get them to call something in for me but since this lip thing happened I figured I might as well go in and get looked at...

the doctor said I might have an abscess or it could be bells palsy (which sometimes comes with Lyme disease) YIPPIE!!

it's been a week now though and the numbness is all but completely gone... I'm gonna have to see a dentist at some point but for now I'm hoping the 3 weeks of toxic waste (doxycycline) do the trick

as for everything else... the monkey and I are getting along fine during the days although Sam says I'm too much of a softy - and he's probably right

I'm having a hard time adjusting to the complete topsy turvy-ness - I'm used to having my days to myself to do whatever the hell I want whenever I want (pretty much) I mean I still have stuff to get done but I can do it on my schedule and watch whatever I want in the process - and now that is pretty much blown all to hell because this kid is SERIOUSLY clingy!! she climbs and hangs onto me like a monkey (hence the name) - and she's a kid so she wants to do stuff all the time... color, play, go outside, dance, do jumping jacks, help me in the kitchen etc.

she refuses to use the bathroom without my presence because she says it's scary in there!!

so I'm finding it hard to get anything done... I can't even complete a thought because just as I start to think something, she jumps in and asks me for something... and she doesn't seem to understand 'hold on a minute, I'm on the phone!!' or I'll be doing the dishes and she wants me to hurry up and make her something to eat or come color with her

she thinks I should just be able to take a day off from my chores and if we run out of clean dishes we'll just go to a restaurant!! haaaaa

anyway... I'm doing pretty well with her during the days even though we have a serious lack of fun activities here in kittyville... especially since I don't drive - thankfully I was blessed with remarkable patience because seriously this child is MUCH more like a 3 year old than a 5 year old!!

she's CONSTANTLY soiling her undies - not sure if it's because she's looking for attention of having too much fun to stop and go to the bathroom - probably a mix of both

but she's a filthy monkey - always sticking her hands in her pants and touching everything and sucking her thumb - she's ALWAYS sucking her thumb... no matter how much she's told big girls don't do that - it's a battle I can't be bothered with - there are much bigger fish to fry

like her complete lack of self confidence, the fact that she can't identify letters and consequently can't even read or write the most basic words - can't identify numbers - etc.

apparently there is a school of thought that such things aren't important at her age - and the 'school' she attends feels this way... I'm HOPING to remedy this somehow while we have her here... I don't care what school you go to - it's important to be able to read and write!! the earlier you start working on it the better!!! who the hell wants to have to try to learn these things when they're 8 or 12 or 24???

anyway... as for how Sam is coping - he's having a very hard time!! the other night I actually found him hiding in the bathroom!! - after he works all day he REALLY needs to decompress and get some quiet relaxation time and well... how do you get that when you have a jumping, singing, dancing, talking monkey in the house??

we get zero time to talk in the evenings - yadda yadda yadda - typical parent BS

only we're NOT parents!!

I think he'd have her on the next flight back to AZ if he could... and to tell ya the truth I'm not far behind... only because I miss US... our routine, our life the way we're used to living it!!

on one hand I can't wait until she's gone and on the other hand I wish she never had to go back - for reasons I just don't feel like getting into at the moment - maybe some other time

I THINK that if we could get into a better routine it would help... if anyone has any suggestions on how to make our evenings more calm... how to stop a kid from peeing and or pooping (sort of) in their pants, sucking their potentially poopy thumb, or to help them learn how to identify letters - feel free to fill me in - cause I'm completely clueless about all things 'parenting' related!!

anyway... I'm trying to pump out this post so I can enjoy my kid free day... my mother took her to work with her for the whole day!! WOO HOO

I'm having a hard time figuring out a way to be able to blog or comment with her around so don't expect to see me around much while she's here - I am checking in and reading blogs - just not having much success working out a way to be my usual commenty self hehehe

the monkey has landed...

thanks to the stupid time difference (and poor planning) their flight got in to NY in the middle of the night... then they had to drive up here so she didn't get to our house until 2am!!

which meant I got virtually NO sleep... between not sleeping very sound while I was anticipating a knock at the door... then being woken up to get her settled on the couch for what was left of the night and me being a not great sleeper to begin with I wound up with maybe 5 hours of really crappy sleep - considering I don't generally function well on less than 6 quality hours AND it was pouring rain here yesterday our first day was a rather LONG... and exhausting one

exhausting but fun

fun until bed time anyway...

we made delicious berry smoothies, played with play doh, watched some cartoons, made grandma a pretty beaded necklace, jumped rope (well SHE did anyway) hehehe - then when the spousal unit got home we made tacos (he helped thank god!!) - I gave her the worlds messiest bath, then grandma came over to brush and braid her hair for bed (she has REALLY LONG hair and I SUCK at that girly hair brushing/braiding stuff)

thennnnnn

seein' as how our bedroom is currently occupied by AC's stuff we needed a place for the monkey to sleep... so we bought a very cute Disney princess tent and put it up in the living room right next to my chair

of course she wanted to stay up late and play play play... but by then I had had enough - phew I had had MORE than enough!!

holy crap - I've said it before and I'll say it again kids were meant for people who are too young and stupid to know what they're getting themselves into!! NOT fat 36 year old couch potatoes!!

anyway... of course she was 'scared' and didn't want to sleep in her tent - even though she had big fun playing in it half the day, for some reason once the sun went down it was sooooooo scary =(

she had been trying to get me to let her stay up late and watch tv and stuff - so who knows if she was just trying to play me or if she was actually scared... she has never spent a night without either mommy or daddy - but I didn't want to make her think she could get her way just by looking pitiful AND I don't want her sleeping on the couch for the whole time she's here or at the very least my poor husband will go insane!! hehehe

we were still finding our groove and she got to bed a half hour late last night - don't think it went over too well with him - especially when she then refused to sleep in her tent - but we finally had her in there and silent by 9 (an hour late) not TOO bad - considering

now after a good nights sleep for all of us - today is another day

wish me luck!!

crowded house...

as if I haven't already been distracted from my little blog to the point of barely posting anymore it looks like a good part of the summer (if not longer) is about to be consumed

apparently my niece is coming for a visit... although the way my sister is talking it might end up being more than a visit - we'll see... either way I don't anticipate there being much time for blogging in the near future

this should be quite an adventure... I've never had a kid for more than a few hours without a parent present to make and enforce the rules - it started out with her coming to visit for a couple weeks... now it's sounding more like a month or maybe the whole summer - maybe even longer!!

my niece loves me - because I'm the happy happy fun-time person... my inner child is very apparent so I'm good at the play time stuff - we'll see how she deals with me when things can't always be fun & games - because I can't have her here for that long and neglect my other household duties (like I tend to do when they come for a visit)

I'm sure this all sounds crazy to you breeders out there who are used to having kids around... but I'm sooooooo NOT used to it

I'm good with the more grandmotherly activities and then sending the kiddo back to mommy when fun time ends... but the difference between me and grandma is grandma's have had the benefit of being mothers first hehehe

I never even babysat as a teenager!!

so it should be interesting... wish me luck!!

in other news:

AC moved in with us a couple months ago... I haven't blogged about it yet because well... he hasn't spent a single night here since he moved in haaaa
we moved our bed out to the far end of our living room (a basically unused area) and gave him our bedroom which he has pretty much filled to the rafters with everything he owns and now he stops by once or twice a week for a change of clothes

his reason for staying with us was so that he could get away from his wackadoo girlfriend - he was actually supposed to leave there two months earlier and it took him that long just to tell her he was leaving - once he did that he had his stuff moved out within a week or so and like I said another 2 months has gone by

so basically he's still living with her with the added inconvenience of everything he owns being in a house in another freakin' county 40+ minutes away!!

I'm not really sure how this will work out having the monkey here AND AC - but I guess we'll cross that bridge when we come to it

anyway... that's what's going on here

now for your listening pleasure:

lucky 13...

Happy Anniversary!!

summertime...

the summertime of my youth was:

feeling the squishiness of the soggy, fresh grass under my bare feet as I sloshed around in the cold pools and streams of melted snow and spring rains that ran through my grandparent's back yard

being sprung from school early on Fridays for trips to lake taghkanic

games of 'mother may I' and 'red light green light' as the sun went down

then catching lightening bugs and letting them loose in my bedroom

waking to the sound of classical music and the delicious smell of Sunday breakfast wafting through the house...

picking black caps (and not being bothered by the heat, bugs or prickers) - it seemed like we'd pick bushels... but very few actually made it to the house - YUM!

swimming... for countless hours - until I practically had to be dragged from the pool with blue lips and chattering teeth!!

stalking around the yard catching frogs, salamanders and caterpillars

the sound of baseball games on my grandfather's transistor radio

hearing the dinner bell at the ranch and realizing the day is almost over =(

ice cream cakes from Carvel and Holy Cow

picking dandelions... a penny a piece

frog jumping contests at the rec on the 4th of July

going outside to wash my hair in the rain

dumping out our huge box of miscellaneous legos all over the living room floor on a boring, rainy day and building practically the same stupid multi-colored house every time

THE FAIR - our last hurrah before school started back up...

and finally... going to the local pizza place to stock up on pies for the winter

man I miss those days!!

technology...

so this morning I get a text from the spousal unit... basically a to-do list (because god knows I didn't already have a to-do list) it says:

litter – call about spigot/plumber – laundry?
Just ideas since Willow is complaining! Hehehe love you

~due to... several reasons - the house is a mess... Willow (our cat) doesn't like when the house is a mess!! she expresses her disapproval by scratching at the mess until you want to throw her out a window... anyway

so I text back to him:

pile of clothes...washing machine...tools in kitchen...kick thingy... stool (as long as we're listing things) :P

a to-do list for him...

and he says:

suck it lick it love it hehehehehe

HA! - so I say:

fix it – finish it – put it away

and he says:

know your role
shut your hole

HAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

ya just gotta love that man o' mine!!

a little while later I'm on facebook doing my daily '5 things' list (because everyone wants to know my top 5 pet peeves) when my sister pops in to chat...

she says:
the monkey (my niece) says HI!

So I said HI!!

she says:
the monkey says she loves you

then as I was saying it back - she said the monkey asked her if she thinks I'll say it back haaaa - as if I wouldn't!!

then she says:
she loves you again and she hopes all your dreams come true because she loves you so much all your dreams come true

have you ever heard anything so adorable in your life??!!

I LOVE technology!! - today anyway